Your story touched me in so many ways. It broke my heart. It made me want to buy your old house and breathe life back into it. It brought back so many memories for me as well, some good and some painful. I think it's extremely well done. It definitely features a lot of emotional appeal. Your purpose is clear from the beginning, and your story remains focused on the purpose throughout. I think your dramatic question is "When I was in 6th grade, my parents decided they wanted to be homeowners". And your story answers that question by showing that even through the bad times, your good memories of growing up in the house remain. Your personal images add just the right touch to a very personal and emotional story. Excellent job!
Amanda, I'm so sorry about your house, and I can understand why everything that happened would be so hard. I think a key question is, what makes a house a home? Once it becomes a home, there are so many tragedies that can happen to tear it down, but the natural disasters don't hurt it like the personal and emotional ones do. I'm sorry to hear about how things turned out, and I could relate to your pain when the house was re-bought by your dad and his new wife. I think the personal images are great, the pictures of you at different stages in your life, and the transformation of the house through the years. The picture of the solitary, empty mailbox post is especially powerful. I'll be interested to see how you fit them all together with the narration! Thanks for sharing this very personal experience.
Main point: how the house is so much a part of your life Point of view: It is clearly a story about a house and the focus is clear throughout the story. Dramatic Question: The decision of owning a home and building your own house. Emotional Content: I can hear the feeling in your voice, the fun watching your house built, helping where you could, knowing every piece of it, the fun you had growing up in the house and the sadness at leaving the house. You were connected to the house. It was part of your life and is a part of your memory. Images: The images are great. I think your idea of using several progression pictures is good. I hope you can find what you want to use.
I thought at one point that you were going to say you had decided to buy the house.
Point of View: You establish the point of view early on as you make the story personal when talking about your family and home. Your main point is to tell the story of growing up in what you thought would be your forever home. Dramatic Question: Will this always be your home? The story holds the attention of viewers very well. The depth of the narration is brilliant and lures thoughts as to what is yet to come in your story. You answer the question in the last few slides of your story with a heartbreaking ending, but yet realistic ending. Emotional content: The emotional content of your story is off the charts! It plays a vital role in keeping the viewer’s attention and interest. This is a story that I feel many viewers can relate to; which again adds to its appeal. Images: The images used are personal and emphasize a vast amount emotional appeal when viewing. It allows viewers to step into a very personal aspect of your life. Allowing them to “take a walk in your shoes”, so to say. You did a great job selecting images and pairing them with the appropriate narrations. The order of the images flow nicely as well! This is a well put together and touching story!
Amanda, Like so many others, being the child of divorced parents is so, so painful. I totally understand what you are talking about with the house, which sometimes is so symbolic of the life that once thrived inside of it. It was somewhat reliving when the house I grew up in burned down. Although it still breaks my heart, the fire was a real physical manifestation of how I felt every time I looked at it. So sad, and I totally understand your pain. Thanks for sharing.
Point of view: The general point of this storyboard is explaining how the house your family built and loved served as a symbol of your family's emotional well being. The walls that seemed to hold in so many great memories opened up and let them all out.
The story really held my attention. I read every single word, and it really made me think of my own family and home. Totally relatable story.
Divorce: Yes, so many people are going to relate with this story. I literally have no friends that have parents that didn't get divorced. None.
The images really helped, as they were of the actual home you are referring. The dark colors of the home actually reminded me of my home. When things were good, it never looked sad, but the darkness really comes through in times of sadness.
Your story does a great job of extending the metaphor of the house and its conditions to the state of your family and how it changed. Your story holds attention because it shares vivid descriptions of both the good and the bad. Any person who is a child of divorced or estranged parents can connect to this story. It's hard to understand why parents sever ties with children, and it's hard to let go of the idea of going home. I like that you end with hope for new life for your old house.
Your story touched me in so many ways. It broke my heart. It made me want to buy your old house and breathe life back into it. It brought back so many memories for me as well, some good and some painful. I think it's extremely well done. It definitely features a lot of emotional appeal. Your purpose is clear from the beginning, and your story remains focused on the purpose throughout. I think your dramatic question is "When I was in 6th grade, my parents decided they wanted to be homeowners". And your story answers that question by showing that even through the bad times, your good memories of growing up in the house remain. Your personal images add just the right touch to a very personal and emotional story. Excellent job!
ReplyDeleteAmanda, I'm so sorry about your house, and I can understand why everything that happened would be so hard. I think a key question is, what makes a house a home? Once it becomes a home, there are so many tragedies that can happen to tear it down, but the natural disasters don't hurt it like the personal and emotional ones do. I'm sorry to hear about how things turned out, and I could relate to your pain when the house was re-bought by your dad and his new wife. I think the personal images are great, the pictures of you at different stages in your life, and the transformation of the house through the years. The picture of the solitary, empty mailbox post is especially powerful. I'll be interested to see how you fit them all together with the narration! Thanks for sharing this very personal experience.
ReplyDeleteMain point: how the house is so much a part of your life
ReplyDeletePoint of view: It is clearly a story about a house and the focus is clear throughout the story.
Dramatic Question: The decision of owning a home and building your own house.
Emotional Content: I can hear the feeling in your voice, the fun watching your house built, helping where you could, knowing every piece of it, the fun you had growing up in the house and the sadness at leaving the house. You were connected to the house. It was part of your life and is a part of your memory.
Images: The images are great. I think your idea of using several progression pictures is good. I hope you can find what you want to use.
I thought at one point that you were going to say you had decided to buy the house.
Point of View: You establish the point of view early on as you make the story personal when talking about your family and home. Your main point is to tell the story of growing up in what you thought would be your forever home.
DeleteDramatic Question: Will this always be your home? The story holds the attention of viewers very well. The depth of the narration is brilliant and lures thoughts as to what is yet to come in your story. You answer the question in the last few slides of your story with a heartbreaking ending, but yet realistic ending.
Emotional content: The emotional content of your story is off the charts! It plays a vital role in keeping the viewer’s attention and interest. This is a story that I feel many viewers can relate to; which again adds to its appeal.
Images: The images used are personal and emphasize a vast amount emotional appeal when viewing. It allows viewers to step into a very personal aspect of your life. Allowing them to “take a walk in your shoes”, so to say. You did a great job selecting images and pairing them with the appropriate narrations. The order of the images flow nicely as well! This is a well put together and touching story!
Amanda,
ReplyDeleteLike so many others, being the child of divorced parents is so, so painful. I totally understand what you are talking about with the house, which sometimes is so symbolic of the life that once thrived inside of it. It was somewhat reliving when the house I grew up in burned down. Although it still breaks my heart, the fire was a real physical manifestation of how I felt every time I looked at it. So sad, and I totally understand your pain. Thanks for sharing.
Point of view: The general point of this storyboard is explaining how the house your family built and loved served as a symbol of your family's emotional well being. The walls that seemed to hold in so many great memories opened up and let them all out.
The story really held my attention. I read every single word, and it really made me think of my own family and home. Totally relatable story.
Divorce: Yes, so many people are going to relate with this story. I literally have no friends that have parents that didn't get divorced. None.
The images really helped, as they were of the actual home you are referring. The dark colors of the home actually reminded me of my home. When things were good, it never looked sad, but the darkness really comes through in times of sadness.
Thank you for sharing, Amanda.
-Michael Gallimore
Your story does a great job of extending the metaphor of the house and its conditions to the state of your family and how it changed. Your story holds attention because it shares vivid descriptions of both the good and the bad.
ReplyDeleteAny person who is a child of divorced or estranged parents can connect to this story. It's hard to understand why parents sever ties with children, and it's hard to let go of the idea of going home.
I like that you end with hope for new life for your old house.